#Blessed

     As I lay in my bed  - no, not the one in Dunmore, the one in the hospital room that really is like home at this point - I can’t help but have unrelenting sense of gratitude for all my blessings. I know that probably sounds crazy, given the circumstances surrounding Jack’s diagnosis and treatment, but it’s true. I am may not be an avid church-goer (sorry Rosie), but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a close relationship with God. In fact, the big guy and I have an open dialogue going these days with the majority of the talking being done by yours truly. However, on nights like tonight when the storm clears and a huge rainbow appears right over Jack’s favorite spot by the window, I can hear God’s message loud and clear: remember there’s always a rainbow after the storm, you just have to look for it. 

     While my conversations with God are between us, I can tell you one of things I have always said is - “Dear God, please continue to bless and protect us.” I’ve actually said this in my head since I was a little girl. Always asking God to basically just keep things as great as they already are, and throw in some added protection.  It is not that I’ve ever been trying to brag that my life is absolutely perfect, but it’s just that I realize how grateful I am for everything that I’m lucky enough to already have. I say this mantra any time I feel that quiet moment that I know God’s listening. I say it when I’m feeling scared, or overwhelmingly happy. It’s just what I’ve always said.

     So, when Jack first got sick, I had a few moments where I was a little bummed that God had forgotten the second part of my intentions. He forgot to protect my family. And in a move that felt like it went straight for the jugular, he forgot to protect the smallest, sweetest, and most vulnerable of us all. However, it didn’t take me very long to realize just how wrong I was. Jack’s Leukemia is rare and can be associated with a poor prognosis, but we caught it early which helps bump up his chances greatly. God gave us all the clues we needed for this to happen - the nosebleeds, the bruises, the change in Jack physically  and emotionally. He was protecting him by helping him signal something was wrong early enough for us to get him better fast. Jack was also protected long before he was even born. His chromosomes are abnormal - something that sounds crazy, but actually again bumps up his chances. Finally, In perhaps the best form of protection yet, God gave us Cooper - who happens to be a perfect bone marrow match for his brother. All of these factors help boost Jack up to an intermediate prognosis. Doctors have said he’s a grey area case for treatment. I prefer to call it a silver lining. 

     These days I’ve moved on from questioning the big man upstairs and instead thank him...a lot. I thank him for all my blessings and how lucky my family is in this crazy situation. I thank him and hope he can get the message to everyone else about just how grateful we feel each day. I thank him for so much: but these are just a few of our blessings:

• My family. The nurses and doctors tell us constantly how lucky we are for the wonderful people we have coming to help us take care of Jack. This kiddo has never had to go through any of this alone, which is not always the case with other patients. We’ve never questioned that someone would always be there for him and thanks to his amazing group of caretakers, we’ve made sure that was the case. Mom, Dad, Amy, Maggie - we are so very blessed to have had you there by our guy’s side.
• My amazing friends. Days after Jack was diagnosed, my amazing friends left their own families to come to the rescue for mine. They drove for an hour to see me, listened and cried with me, and turned around and went back. They came again a short time later just to take me out to eat and get me out of the hospital to share a few laughs. They’ve been there for me constantly. Checking in and offering to help. Now they are taking on the crazy task of planning an event in our honor. I simply have no words. My girls - I don’t know what I did to deserve friends like you, but all I can say is that I’m the luckiest girl in the world. A life filled with a friendship like ours will always be my favorite blessing. 
• We talk each day about how in the split second that we had to decide on a hospital, we chose Janet Weis. While we know that Jack would get the same protocols for care anywhere, there are so many things about this little hospital that are so amazing and have made my family so lucky to be here. First, Jack is under the care of the greatest nurses, who we are now lucky enough to call our friends. Some of them are so young that it would be easy to question them - until you see them in action. They are a well oiled machine when it comes to medical care, yet they are some of the most beautiful souls I’ve ever met - inside and out. They all know Jack and honesty love him. When we heard this will be his last round of chemo, we all celebrated with a note of sadness because we knew we wouldn’t see each other as often. Since we’ve been here there have been babies born, weddings celebrated, and future weddings planned. We’ve talked about so much and have formed such great bonds. We will miss them dearly but all look forward to our many, many years of follow up visits, and watching our boy grow up and finally finding out what his hair will grow back like!
• Then there are Jack’s doctors. They know him so well and know us well by proxy. When you are trusting someone with your son’s care, you gain this level of respect and admiration that is insane. I get to teach children art for a living, and there isn’t a day that I leave work without thinking about them that night. These doctors are literally saving lives each day and manage to remain human. I can’t imagine what their late at night thoughts are but I can guarantee that they are thinking of our guy very often. 
• Another part of Janet Weis is the area itself. Now that Cooper is allowed to come to the hospital, we are so lucky to say that he loves it here. It’s not hard to see why. The Ronald McDonald house is the most wonderful place. He looks forward to staying and playing there each time he comes. Then there’s all the amazing things he’s been able to do when he visits. He’s a Knobles connoisseur. He knows the park inside and out and loves telling everyone about it. He’s recently hit the 42 inch mark (on his toes but who’s counting) and now goes on the big coasters - so obviously he’s a legend in his own mind. He’s also been able to visit the Bloomsburg and Lewisburg Children’s Museums, as well as Clyde Peelings Reptile Land. Basically when this is all said and done, he will be available for tours of Danville area things to do, and if you know anything about Cooper, you know how informative those tours would be. 
• While I can go on and on about the many blessings in our life, full disclosure - I totally need to go to bed. So for now, the last blessing is you. All of the people following our story. Those helping us through support and prayer. Our lives are forever changed because of all of you and we will forever be grateful.